Saturday, 9 March 2013

Dr. Alien (1989)

"She has the cure for growing pains..."
There comes a time in every boys life where they experience the problem this piece of educational film making covers. That moment where all of a sudden your hormones, the testosterone completely takes over and next thing you know, you are beating the women off left right and centre. OK that is completely bullshit and that has nothing to do with this film but I needed your attention. Sit down and shut up because class is in session!

Dr. Alien is another film by prolific cheese director David DeCoteau from 1989. What we have in this fine effort is a teen comedy in which a socially awkward, intelligent teenage boy gets wrapped up in an intergalactic breeding plot when his biology teacher has an accident and his replacement is a stunner of an alien (would a female alien technically be called alienne?) who is trying to secure the future of her planet. The experiment makes our likable lead become a pussy magnet with a rather nasty looking fleshy antenna on his head.... so damn hot! As he's beating the women off with a stick (not literally, it's not one of those movies... sicko!) his heart is for one girl only and boy is she a cutie! No big twists or turns in this one folks!

Because I am good to you sleazehounds out there, let's get the main reason you are going to buy this film out of the way first, the women! Oh yes gentlemen (and ladies of course) we have a fine display of treats on offer! The big names I was glad to see where of course Linnea Quigley and even better, Ginger Lynne! Of course I have to mention Judy Landers who plays our teacher and last but by no means least, my personal favourite of the film, Olivia Barash who plays as the adorable love interest. Of course this film is littered in pure, unadulterated female nudity so if that's your thing then this a perfect film for you!

This film has more than just eye candy though. Our main guy is a genuinely likable chap even when he lets his new found sex appeal get to his head (literally... I'm hilarious!). You genuinely root for him when he gets mobbed by gangs of nubile young things and you want him to get the girl at the same time. It's a genuinely funny film which like most films of this type and era, don't take themselves too seriously. There is a never a dull moment and that's what I really enjoyed most about this one, especially when you look at modern teen comedies which are just crude, unfunny pieces of crap.

The story is nice and simple and the characters are all a joy to watch. You get a real sense that this was a fun film to make and there's something about films from the 80's in high schools and colleges that just appeal to me. The film has many memorable moments including the various dreams our stud has, the awesome gig scene towards the end of the film, a rather fun scene that involves a mobbing in the girls showers and a great climax. Of course, the film is littered with gems and it would do a great injustice to just tell you and not experience it for yourself.

Overall I highly recommend this film to anyone who loves a good cheesy ride... and of course bodacious boobs by the spacecraft load. If you are looking for that outlandish strong stinking bishop style cheese however, you might not fully get that experience but I'm sure you connoisseurs out there know this already. Once again 88 Films have put a great package with the trailers, reversible artwork and of course the bonus film which in this case is a rather interesting oddity from the early 1970's called Auditions which is kinda like a 70's version of a porno casting couch video... only the wannabe stars don't get humiliated by the redneck behind the camera!

Had to end on a high note!


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